Curses!

Miss Vinegar must really apologize for her long absence: without any conscious effort on her part, her life had temporarily become a world of overspreading malaise, incipient rhinovirus, and (more to the point) the same restaurants over and over. As the weather becomes more seasonable and her urge to move about increases, look once more for your hardy reviewer to emerge and rave, one way or the other, about food.

The topic that has finally raised Miss Vinegar from her sickbed (and don't forget the malaise!) has been troubling her for some time, almost since the TGI Friday's chain opened a restaurant in Roanoke. The tales spread like urban legend: some said it was less-than-standard service; others told of diet drinks offered in place of regular, of special orders come to naught, or given to the wrong person. But it took Miss Vinegar's trip there last weekend, when PoBoy cut open his delicious-looking steak to find that it was 70% fat, that she finally realized: this particular TGI Friday's is cursed.

She is serious about this. Miss Vinegar has a large soft spot for the chain as one of the restaurants of her youth, and one of the few big-name chains to offer any kind of adequate take on Asian fusion cuisine. The food is terrific and the service is good...except for the fact that something always goes wrong. Not the same thing every time, which would indicate an addressable business problem, but a veritable smorgasboard of potential misfortunes. No natural explanation will suffice, so Miss Vinegar is pleased to offer the following supernatural ones:

• Franchise built on burial ground of the same evil people who afflicted the Poltergeist family;
• Despite rumors that he was but a marketing invention, ghost of T.G.I. Friday is present, restless, and angry;
• Kung Pow chicken's general spicy goodness has offended a volcano god with inadequacy issues;
• Evil fairy Maleficent not invited to store's christening.

Even so, you should take your chances, slip a good luck charm in your pocket, and head over, if only because Jack Daniel's grilling sauce is stronger than evil.